"CELEBRATING WOMEN - CHALLENGES, OPPORTUNITIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES" AND THE LAUNCH OF WISE (WOMEN INTERACTIVE SERIES)

MCYS SPEECH NO: 10/2008 DATE OF ISSUE: 20/02/2008

SPEECH BY MRS YU-FOO YEE SHOON,MINISTER OF STATE FOR COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT, YOUTH AND SPORTS, AT THE SEMINAR ON "CELEBRATING WOMEN - CHALLENGES, OPPORTUNITIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES" AND THE LAUNCH OF WISE (WOMEN INTERACTIVE SERIES), 20 FEBRUARY 2008, 7.00 PM AT NTUC CENTRE Mdm Halimah Yacob, Deputy Secretary-General, NTUC & Director, NTUC Women’s Development Secretariat, Ms Diana Chia, Vice-Chairperson, NTUC Women’s Development Secretariat, Distinguished Guests, Ladies and Gentlemen, Good evening, INTRODUCTION I am delighted to be here this evening for the launch of the Women Interactive Series or WISE. I congratulate the NTUC Women’s Development Secretariat and the Legal Services Department for organising this Series to educate and engage women on prevailing issues they face at various stages of their personal, working and family life. This excellent initiative serves three objectives. Firstly, for women to voice their aspirations and concerns. Secondly, for NTUC to monitor socio-economic change and trends affecting women so that it could recommend timely and appropriate measures to improve women’s well-being and employment opportunities. And thirdly, to ensure effective integration of women at all levels of decision-making in the trade union movement. NTUC hopes to reach out to at least 2,000 women through workshops and talks which will also cover provisions in the Employment Act, the Women’s Charter, the Penal Code, the Children Development Co-Savings Act, the UN Convention for the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination against Women (CEDAW for short) and the ILO Convention No 100 on Equal Remuneration with its commitment on equal pay for equal work. No longer can gender be seen merely as a soft social or human rights issue. It also has economic impact. The United Nations Economic and Social Commission for Asia and the Pacific (UN ESCAP for short), estimated that the Asia-Pacific region is losing as much as US$ 47 billion of output per year from a lack of female labour force participation. And as much as US$ 30 billion because of the gender gaps in education systems. The theme of today’s seminar, “Celebrating Women – Challenges, Opportunities and Responsibilities” is timely because there is much for Singapore women to celebrate. Let me start off by highlighting some significant progress made by our women in recent years. PROGRESS AND ACHIEVEMENTS Quality of Life Singapore women are now better educated. Our literacy rate for resident females aged 15 years and over was 93.3% in 2006, up from 89% in 2000. Women now make up half of Singapore’s student population in tertiary institutions and are well-represented in traditionally male-dominated courses such as engineering, accountancy and mathematics. More women are joining the workforce – the share of females in the labour force has increased from 50% in 2000 to 54% in 2007. 60% of single females are working while 56% of married females are working. More are climbing up the corporate ladder, in both public and private sectors. Women now make up 40% of Managers, Professionals and Technicians, up from 36% in 2000. A number of women leaders from other countries, including some from developed countries, told me that the percentage surpassed theirs. While males still dominate the business scene, female entrepreneurs have been making their mark. In October 2006, two female entrepreneurs (out of a total of 16) were awarded the Top Entrepreneur Award at the Entrepreneur of the Year 2007 - a Rotary-ASME Award ceremony. They were Mdm Annie Gan Giok Em of Jian Huang Construction Co Pte Ltd, and Ms Yvette Chiang of Rustic Nirvana Pte Ltd. In 2006, Mrs Helen Khoo of Wing Tai Retail Pte Ltd emerged as one of the three winners of the International Management Action Awards, administered by the Chartered Management Institute, Singapore and the Standards, Productivity and Innovation Board (Spring Singapore). The number[1] of women-only professional and business networks is growing. Of the Singapore Council of Women’s Organisations’ (SCWO) 53 member organisations, 16 of them cater to business and professional women. One of the more established associations, the Financial Women's Association of Singapore has seen its membership figures almost double to 400 members since 2005, following the growth in the financial industry. The wage gap between women and men has also narrowed. In 2006, women earned 86% of what the men were earning, up from 83% a decade ago. This income level gap is comparable to that of a number of developed countries in the West, although we still lagged behind countries such as Norway, France, Australia and Portugal. And in the younger age groups, some of our women are earning more than their male counterparts. Females within the age group 25 to 29 earned higher median gross wage than males in three major occupational groups, namely, managers (10.8 per cent more), professionals (6.7 percent more), and sales and service workers (31 percent more) in June 2006[2]. In politics, 24.5% or 23 out of 94 Members of Parliament are women. Prior to the 2006 General Election, 16% or 15 out of 93 elected Members of Parliament (MPs) were women. Within the civil service, 57% of senior officers in Division 1 and Superscale level are women. Our women have access to quality healthcare. The life expectancy rate for women has increased from 80.1 years in 2000 to 81.8 years in 2006. For males, life expectancy was 78 years in 2006, a difference of almost 4 years. In terms of causes of death, females registered a higher proportion in cerebrovascular disease as well as kidney and disorders of the urinary system.[3] Singapore is lagging behind in total fertility rate. The total fertility rate was 1.26 in 2006, a slight increase of 0.01 from 2005. This is low especially in comparison with Australia (1.81), France (2.0) and the Scandinavian countries – Norway 1.9, Sweden 1.85, and Denmark 1.85. Our women are also having children later. The peak age-group has moved from 25-29 years in 1996, to the age-group 30-34 years in 2006[4]. Our women also enjoy comprehensive legal protection under the law and equal civil rights. TURNING SOCIAL AND ECONOMIC CHALLENGES INTO OPPORTUNITIES However, despite these achievements, challenges remain. In a world where innovative ideas, information and creativity become increasingly valuable, women can be employed in an increasing variety of jobs. And more will attain executive positions. We need to do more to increase the number of women in decision-making positions and as entrepreneurs. According to a recent study conducted by Mastercard, there is a significant gender gap in entrepreneurial activity of 8.76%. Women are also less able to sustain their business beyond 42 months – 2.5% compared to 7.49% for men. And with women now living longer than their husbands, we can expect to see an increase in the incidence of widowhood and lonely aged women. The younger women need to be prepared to take of their aged relatives. And they too need to be prudent and be financially prepared for their old age. We also need to help these women age actively. Today, there are more opportunities for skills upgrading and training to keep us up-to-date with workplace changes. This is especially important for women who want to reintegrate into the workforce. They have to upgrade relevant skills such as computer literacy and language. Companies who wish to rehire these women should have a database of employable former women employees. This will enable the companies to keep track of such employees and help them to refresh their skills and knowledge to help them re-enter the workforce. More Dual-career Couples With better education and training opportunities, we are seeing a rise in the number of dual-career couples. In 2005, dual-career couples formed 44% of married couples in Singapore, up from 41% in 2000 and 27% in 1980[5]. Their average monthly income was $7,600, twice the income of sole-career couples where only one person, usually the husband, was working. Interestingly, the wives were also contributing an increasingly bigger share to the family income. The average income share of working wives among dual-career couples increased from 42% in 2000 to 44% in 2005. Among all dual-career couples in 2005, 35% obtained at least half of their combined income from wives’ earnings. This shows the importance of the working wives’ contribution to the family income. With more women in the workforce, we need to work toward providing even more accessible, affordable and quality family-friendly support services such as child care and elder care services to help women transit more smoothly from and into the work force. The Tripartite Workgroup on Enhancing Employment Choices for Women, chaired by Mdm Halimah, will be coming up with recommendations to further enable and empower women to make viable work options which harmonise their personal, family and work commitments. The preliminary findings of a 2007 survey of 3,000 (Singapore Citizens and PRs) baby boomers in Singapore, showed that about 30% of female respondents had never worked before. This could affect their financial situation in their old age. The study also indicated that 42% of economically active female Singapore citizens and 50% of economically active female PRs preferred to work during their post-retirement years, either on a part-time or flexi-time basis. While the key reason cited was to receive an income, the respondents also indicated their wish to keep active and to do something meaningful and stay connected. More details on this study will be released later. Skills Training I encourage women to learn new skills continuously so that we can stay relevant in this fast changing knowledge-based economy. Let me share with you what a lady in my constituency is doing to improve her family’s financial situation. Mdm Wong Siew Buay used to distribute newspapers every morning and collect cardboard in her free time. She earns about $290 per month to supplement her husband’s variable income of $950 a month. With their household income of about $1,200, they support four school-going children. Mdm Wong decided to enrol in a Certificate in Business Administration last October. The PSB course is held twice weekly, from 7-10pm and she is sponsored by CDAC. Mdm Wong will graduate in Nov 2008 and she looks forward to becoming an Administrative Assistant, with an expected monthly income of $900 to $1,000. This will double their current household income. Mdm Wong’s family is supportive of her studies. Her perseverance in improving herself is an inspiration to us. It is an example of the important role women play in enhancing the family’s financial security and in fostering self-reliance. The Women’s Register With more women returning to work, there is also a need to ensure that women are given more avenues to take on leadership positions, where they can make the most impact. This evening, I am pleased to release the latest updates on the number, profile and outcome of the Women’s Register, which is a bold initiative by the Singapore Council of Women’s Organisations with the support of the National Volunteer and Philanthropy Centre. Launched on International Women’s Day in March last year, the Register is an online database resource aimed at increasing the level of female representation in leadership positions in the public, private and non-profit sectors. There were 306 registrants as at 31 December 2007 and 27 corporate users. 4% of the registrants have PhDs, 28% with Master’s degrees, 44% bachelor’s degrees and 11% are diploma holders. In terms of occupation, 42% of the 306 registrants are managers, 18% executives, 3% doctors, 7% entrepreneurs, 14% trainers/teachers. The impressive educational and occupational profile reflects the talent pool which the public, private and people sectors can tap for committees and boards. To date, more than 20% of the corporate users have tapped the register to identify women leaders to become mentors and board members. I understand that more than 80 Register members have volunteered their services for the Samaritans of Singapore (SOS) Hotline. The SCWO and the Singapore Institute of Directors are also exploring opportunities to include suitable registrants on boards. This is cause for celebration because the increase in the number of talented women on executive committees and boards bodes well for women’s progress and leadership. CONCLUSION We recognise that there is no one best way for women to lead their lives. Each and every one of us has a choice to make for ourselves, whether it is in the workplace or at home – as wives, mothers, daughters, workers, or leaders. What is important is that we are equipped with the right skills and mindset to ensure that we are well-placed to cope with the challenges and remain as active, healthy members of society. For ultimately, when women have the opportunity to be the best that they can be, our families, our community and our nation will flourish. It now gives me great pleasure to launch WISE - the Women Interactive Series. I wish all of you a fruitful evening of learning and sharing. Thank you. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [1] "Women-only business and professional networks sprout", 26 Nov 2007, www.straitstimes.com [2] Source: Report on Wages in Singapore 2006, released in June 2007. [3] Source: Report on Registration of Births and Deaths 2006 [4] Source: Population Trends 2007 [5] Source: "Trends in Dual-Career Couples, 2005". Singapore Department of Statistics, December 2006.

A cause for serious concerns among young girls in Singapore

March 22, 2008 - Straits Times Saturday Special Reports

Girls behaving badly
Some girls here are getting wilder and getting into trouble with the law. They are getting arrested for causing serious hurt and rioting. They also join gangs and experiment with sex at a younger age, some as young as 10. Joan Chew, Chia Mei Liang, He Xingying and Ong Dai Lin report on young girls running wild.
JANE joined a gang at 13 after getting to know its members through her friends. She skipped school to smoke, drink, play cards and steal bicycles at void decks.

At first, she was just looking for a bit of fun. But soon, she was sniffing glue at HDB staircases, selling illegal cigarettes at the housing estate opposite her school and picking fights with other gangs.

During one of these fights, the police showed up. By 14, she was placed in a girls' shelter after her father declared her Beyond Parental Control.

Other girls like Jane are getting into all kinds of trouble with the law.

Last year, 46 girls - aged seven to 19 - were arrested for causing serious hurt and rioting. Another 766 were picked up for theft.

Overall, the number of girls arrested over the past three years for causing serious hurt and rioting has come down, according to police.

But more parents are giving up on delinquent daughters than sons, and seeking help at the Juvenile Court. In the last two years, more Beyond Parental Control complaints were filed against girls than boys.

In 2006, 86 girls were hauled to court by their parents and declared out of control, compared to 61 boys. The figure for girls was 70 the year before.

Children declared Beyond Parental Control are those below 16 who misbehave to such an extent that their parents feel they can no longer control them and need the court's assistance to manage them.

More girls are also experimenting with sex, some as young as 10. In 2006, teenagers accounted for 12 per cent of about 12,000 abortions performed in Singapore. Of these, 19 were carried out on girls below 15, according to the Health Ministry.

More girls between the ages of 10 to 19 are also contracting sexually transmitted infections. In 2006, more than 500 of such cases were diagnosed at the Department of Sexually Transmitted Infections Control Clinic - a three- fold increase from five years ago.

Self-mutilation is another emerging spectre. Although there are no statistics available, counsellors and social workers say girls are more likely to cut or bruise themselves than boys.

The danger is that when they are not taught other coping methods, the cuts get progressively deeper, till they land in hospital.

Cyber bullying

ANOTHER worrying trend is cyber bullying among girls, abetted by the Internet and mobile phones today.

Many hide behind computer screens to bully their victims, instead of confronting them in person. On blogs, they abuse their victims using expletives, deface their pictures and spread vicious rumours about them.

Since polytechnic student Esther Chia, 18, set up a blog documenting her daily life last May, she has seen mocking photographs of a boy imitating her 'doe-eyed innocent look'. Others have left jeers like 'you are ugly' and 'you suck' on her blog.

'When I have had a hard day, seeing such comments when I get home makes me feel worse,' says the teen who receives about 3,000 hits on her blog daily and is now hardened to the routine abuse.

According to Ms Esther Ng, who founded Coalition Against Bullying for Children and Youths in 2005 to stamp out such behaviour, female cyber bullies choose to assault others online because they can stay comfortably anonymous.

'The Internet is one of the simplest tools to use. It is easily available and the bully doesn't have to face the victim. It also spreads faster and the bullies think they will not get caught,' she adds.

Increasingly too, girls are using their cellphones to record acts of bullying and aggression. They then post the video clips on free video-sharing websites like YouTube to humiliate their victims.

For extra bragging rights, they also circulate the clips among their friends using Multimedia Messaging Service (MMS) or Bluetooth technology.

A widely circulated and disturbing four-minute video posted online was brought up in Parliament in January by Jalan Besar GRC MP Lily Neo. It showed four girls laughing gleefully as they punched, slapped and stripped their 13-year-old victim at an HDB staircase landing. They stopped only when onlookers gathered.

The victim hung her head in shame throughout. But like many other bullying clips posted online, it spread like wildfire. Ms Ng observes: 'There are schools where almost everybody has seen the video.'

Hard candy

THE Internet is also used by girls to hunt down men willing to pay - in cash or branded goods - for sex.

Popular advertisement websites such as SgAdsOnline and Craigslist Singapore carry advertisements of teenage girls offering one-night stands for fast cash.

Others use sexy blogs as a tool to hunt down Sugar Daddies willing to pay for a 'relationship'.

One 17-year-old, who calls herself a 'teenage Lolita', documented her sexual experiences and said she is looking for a man who can give her $500 per meeting.

She wrote that she is 'not poor' but 'hankers after the better things in life'.

'I'm not selling my body. I call it a mutually beneficial relationship,' she declared in one entry.

Others post photographs of themselves in skimpy outfits on social networking websites like Friendster and Facebook.

Teen blogger Celeste Chen thrusts her hips suggestively in a midriff-baring blouse in one MTV-style video posted on her blog. The 17-year-old schoolgirl's Friendster profile features a wallpaper of her in a backless top, matched with black hot pants and high heels. She declined to be interviewed for this report.

Why are girls behaving so badly?

Counsellors say dysfunctional media influences like pop star Britney Spears, rising materialism and weakening family bonds are possible factors.

Many girls feel pressured to look good and dress well. When they do not have the money to buy what they want, they resort to begging, borrowing, stealing or selling sex.

Most start out by shoplifting items like accessories, clothes, bags and cosmetics, notes Ms Eileen Chua, assistant director of Lakeside Family Centre, which has seen more delinquent girls over the years.

Sandy, 15, says she took to peddling illegal cigarettes at the void deck to supplement her $5 daily allowance. She made about $150 a day.

'I used to steal money from my father but my friend told me not to do it. She introduced me to selling cigarettes instead,' says the Secondary 3 dropout.

But the money ran out soon after she ran away from home.

Bad girls, good homes

IT USED to be that bad girls who stole, fought and joined gangs mostly came from broken families. Not any more, say counsellors.

In recent years, many who face court orders or get caught by the police come from intact homes, says Dr Carol Balhetchet, director of youth services at the Singapore Children's Society.

In 2006, 69 per cent of new probation cases involved delinquent youth who come from two-parent nuclear families, according to the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports (MCYS).

'Teenagers today have the attitude that no one can discipline them or make them do what they don't want to do,' says social worker Ms Chua.

Indeed, Mr Mohamed Juffri openly admits he has lost control of his eldest daughter, who just turned 14. She tells lies and stays away from home for days at a stretch. 'I'm worried that she may be hanging out with gangs.

I don't know who her friends are,' he says.

Last month, the 40-year-old security officer and his sales promoter wife hardened their hearts and filed a Beyond Parental Control court order against her.

'This is our last resort. We do not want her to waste her life away,' he says sadly. In between all the 12-hour shifts he worked, she became a stranger.

Sister Maria Sylvia Ng, formerly in charge of Poverello Teen Centre, a drop-in centre for delinquent youth, warns: 'If parents do not inculcate values in their children when they are young, there is no holding them back when they reach adolescence.'

Farhana, 14, knows her mother loses sleep whenever she hangs out with friends at West Coast Park past 11 pm. But she shrugs it off.

She used to see very little of her mother, who worked long hours as a restaurant helper. The Secondary 2 student rationalises: 'When I wanted to talk to her, she was always not there.'

Her mother has quit her job to spend more time with her, but it is too little, too late for Farhana. She rants: 'I don't understand my mother. I tell her who I'm with but she's still worried. When I come home late, she calls the police. We often quarrel about this.'

Dr Balhetchet says teens like Farhana often make it difficult for parents to talk to them. In their desire to grow up fast and be independent, they send out messages to their parents to 'leave them alone'.

But what they really hanker after - at any age - is time and attention. So most neglected youth misbehave to get their parents to notice them, notes counsellor Stella Tan from Yong-En Care Centre.

'They know that their parents will have to spend more time with them in order to scold them,' she says.

She stresses the importance of parents being there for their children.

'When they are young, they may bore you with minor details about school. But if you shut them off, they grow up thinking that you do not have time for them.

'Eventually when you start to get interested in what they do, they will say they have no time to talk to you.'

Names of the girls have been changed to protect their identities


March 22, 2008
Joining the gangs: Where things get ugly
Vicious fights, taking and selling drugs, and providing sex in return for protection are the norm
GANGSTER girls no longer watch from the sidelines when their boyfriends fight. They join in the action, raining blows on victims with their bare fists, not stopping till they see blood.

During a fight in Kallang Bahru, pint-size Cindy (not her real name), 16, once pounded a girl with her bare hands at an HDB staircase landing. 'I hit her until she was down and sat on her. Then I pulled back her head and banged it on the ground repeatedly,' she relates in a matter-of-fact manner.

She then ripped her victim's blouse, exposing her bra. Her friend joined in, trampling on the girl's private parts with her high heels. The victim had to be taken to hospital that night, unable to squat or urinate.

Cindy was arrested and put on one year's detention at the Singapore Girls' Home and two years' home probation.

She tells how, before fights, the rules are laid down. A common rule is Square Box, where both sides agree to attack only the upper torso. But if one party cheats, it becomes an 'open fight'.

Cindy recounts: 'Once, when I fought with a girl, she punched my nose when she was losing the fight. So I hit back at her face and tore her uniform. Both sides were telling me, 'Enough, enough', but I didn't care.'

Another rule is to fight only as long as it takes for a lighted cigarette to burn out, usually five minutes.

'If my friend is winning the fight, I will just hold the cigarette and not smoke. But if my friend is losing, I will puff the cigarette continuously,' she says.

Most of the time, gangster girls fight over territory, boyfriends and staring incidents. At other times, they fight to protect their turf. 'If they win, we give the place to them. If they don't, they have to get out,' says Cindy.

To train for fights, the gangster girls hold sparring sessions to perfect their punches and kicks and pick up new moves. The better fighters train the rest.

Aisah, 16, who used to hang out with a 20-member girl gang in Bukit Panjang, recounts: 'They will go to one another's house and have sparring sessions. Some know a lot of different fighting stances and they will teach others.'

Other illegal activities include taking drugs or, more commonly, sniffing glue.

Cindy, who joined the gang at 13, became a regular glue sniffer. 'There was once I inhaled until I fainted and my friend had to help me up,' she says.

When flush with cash, they splurge on Ecstasy and ketamine party drugs.

'I used to take drugs until I had no money,' says Cindy, the only child of an equipment operator and housewife, who was given a monthly allowance of $400. When low on funds, she peddled drugs in Geylang.

The gang ethos is to do everything together - including dressing alike as a show of sisterhood.

Members of Aisah's gang, for example, wore short skirts, high heels, thick make-up and brand- name bags whenever they went out together.

Members of Lucifer, a girl gang in Woodlands, had devil tattoos on their arms or the back of their necks to show their unity, says Mr Yusof Ismail, a counsellor and chief executive of Ain Society, which works with youth at risk.

'They would wear tank tops to show off the tattoos. They bashed people up mercilessly, even for minor incidents, and made it known that it was done by Lucifer,' he says.

There are also girls who prefer to join mixed gangs or form affiliations with boys to receive protection from them. In return, the boys are allowed to pick any girl to sleep with. 'If the boys insist, there is little the girls can do,' says Aisah.

But if a girl wants out, she would be expected to 'roll over' - have sex with all the boys in the gang - before being freed.

Although rare, counsellor Evelyn Lai from youth development centre Dreams @ Kolam Ayer, observes that such sexual practices do happen as these girls do not regard having sex as 'a big deal'.

Most of them join gangs for the promise of friendship and affirmation but find it difficult to leave to make a fresh start in life.

Ms Doris Yap, programme executive of Youth Guidance Outreach Services, a Christian social work agency that helps troubled teens, notes that this is because it is hard to find an alternative, all-encompassing support group.

'Nobody else celebrates their birthdays, but this group of friends will do so with them. To help them leave the gangs, they need to have true friends who can give them company and positive validation.'

When Cindy got tired of being repeatedly hauled up by the police for fighting, shoplifting and rioting, she left the gang for good.

After playing truant for the past two years, she is now appealing to her secondary school to take her back. If she is successful, she will re-enter at Sec 2. Her peers have moved on to Sec 4.

But what bothers her more is how difficult it will be to 'mix with the good girls' again. 'Our lives are totally different. They study every day but I want to have fun,' she laments.


March 22, 2008
She joined for fun, but leaving was not so easy
Teen's newfound 'friends' would not let her go without paying a 'penalty'
ATTRACTED by fun and easy money, Siti (not her real name), 17, a Secondary 4 school dropout, joined a gang two years ago.

At first, she was treated 'like a queen'.

'The gang members would be very concerned about me and ask me why I looked moody. They took me to clubs and paid for all my expenses,' says Siti, who never had such attention lavished on her before.

Her parents divorced when she was six and she lives with her father. A store assistant who works 11 hours a day, he has little time for her. She speaks to her mother, a hawker's assistant who has remarried, on the phone once a week - mainly to extract pocket money.

Over two years with the gang, Siti loitered at Marsiling and Boon Lay, smoking, picking fights and selling illegal VCDs. She helped keep a lookout for the police, earning up to $200 a day for three hours of work.

'The first time I ran from the police, I was scared. But the second and third time, it felt normal,' says the lanky 1.62m-tall teen who has bronze-streaked hair.

All cashed up, Siti and her gangster friends would book hotel rooms in Geylang and down Ecstasy pills together. The rooms cost around $40 a night and they booked up to five rooms each time.

'It was very fun. When the music was turned on, all I knew was to dance, dance, dance,' she says.

During gang clashes, her self-worth and status soared, as she was deemed 'a good fighter'. Once, when a girl provoked a fellow gang member, Siti tore open the girl's shirt, stomped on her chest, then spat at her to show her 'hatred'.

She recalls: 'The first time I fought, I was 'somebody'. At home, when I failed my exams, my parents would say: 'You're a waste of money.' But in my gang, I got a name for myself by fighting well. That's why I kept going back. My friends believed in me.'

But eight months later, Siti got sick of bloody fights and having to flee from the police practically every day. She stopped answering gang members' calls and excused herself from meetings.

But the gang would not let her off so easily. They issued an ultimatum - she had to have sex with all 15 boys in the gang, one after another, if she wanted to quit. As part of the ritual called 'rolling over', they would also videotape her naked body and circulate it among their friends.

Most of the girls in the gang considered rolling over a 'normal practice' and it upset Siti greatly. 'Other girls in the gang can give the boys their bodies after knowing them for one or two hours, but I'm not like that,' she says.

So she begged her elder brother, who is 19 and with another gang, to help her leave without paying the penalty. His gang slugged it out with hers - and won. Siti's gang let her off the hook and agreed to 'settle any future unhappiness' with her brother.

Siti, now a private school student, goes to Ain Society, a voluntary welfare organisation which helps youth at risk in Bukit Batok, every day.

She has found new friends among the other troubled teens there. 'We have the same kind of attitude and at first, we didn't like each other. But they're like mirror images of me,' she says.

Last year, Siti obtained three N-level passes as a private candidate and is now taking a course in customer service.

She is still afraid of running into her ex-gang members and keeps her head down whenever she passes their old hang-outs.

But she has not looked back on her decision to quit.

'I regret joining the gang, especially because I made my mother cry. She thought I gave my body to the boys. I thought she didn't love me. But she cried because of me so I felt I needed to change.'

March 22, 2008
They cut themselves to cope with hurt
Teenage girls are more likely than boys to practise self-mutilation, say counsellors
ALONE in her room, 15-year-old Stephanie searched for a clear landing between the livid, red scars criss-crossing her left forearm. There was none.

Sighing, she placed the blade of her penknife at the base of her elbow where a wound had barely healed and dug in.

Immediately, blood spurted out and numbness set in.

Stephanie cuts herself whenever she feels 'emotionally unstable', usually after quarrels with friends.

'When I forget to buy things which they've asked me to, they get angry with me and I feel frustrated. That makes me want to cut so that I can feel better,' said the Secondary 3 student from an all-girls school. Her parents divorced when she was five and she lives with her mother.

Sometimes, her body becomes her emotional canvas on which she carves words like 'angry', 'hurt' and 'frustrated' with her blade.

Like Stephanie, many teenage girls are using self-mutilation as an outlet to cope with emotions they cannot handle, said counsellors.

Besides cutting their skin with sharp objects, other popular ways of self-injury include pulling at the skin or hair, burning parts of the body with wax or bruising themselves.

Counsellors and social workers noted that the trend of self-mutilation is prevalent in all-girls schools.

Denise, 16, said that in her Normal (Academic) class of 42 girls, she knows of at least five others who cut themselves. Watching them in action piqued her curiosity.

She said she first cut herself in the classroom after being badmouthed by friends.

'I borrowed a penknife and cut a few lines,' she said, adding that she felt calmer afterwards.

No one tried to stop her.

A social worker at Denise's school confirmed this.

Out of every 10 students she has counselled there, about seven were practising self-mutilation, said Mrs Rachael Lim of Care Community Services Society.

'I suspected that many students were doing it. Almost every time I talked to a student, she would have issues about self-harm. It got a little scary,' she recalled.

The numbers dropped tremendously to about three out of every 10 troubled students last year after counsellors conducted sessions with the girls to discuss the dangers of self-mutilation.

'We helped them to explore alternatives to cutting and introduced more positive coping skills like music and sports,' she said.

Counsellors and social workers noted that more teenage girls than boys take to cutting themselves.

According to Ms Eileen Chua, assistant director of Lakeside Family Centre, this is because boys express themselves in other ways. They usually take out their hurt and frustration through sports or smoking and drinking.

Another reason is girls' susceptibility to peer pressure, said social worker Joyz Tan from Fei Yue Community Services.

'It used to be that when you had a problem, you'd share it with me, we'd talk about it and that'd be it,' she said.

'But now, when they know that their friends cut themselves and they see their scars, they think the way to cope with problems is to cut.'

Ms Melissa Lim, centre director of Students Care Service (Yishun), termed this group 'copy-cutters'.

One of them is Shuling, 15, who tried to emulate her fashionably dysfunctional friends, then got hooked.

'It's harmless fun. I like to see the blood flow. When my skin splits open, I feel like a paper being torn,' she said.

Many believe they are hurting no one but themselves. But there are instances when the cuts get too deep, the bleeding won't stop, or the wounds get infected and the girls end up in hospital.

Also, cutting to relieve tension can be addictive.

Consultant psychiatrist Daniel Fung, who is chief of child and adolescent psychiatry at the Institute of Mental Health, likens it to getting a runner's high.

'When there is pain, the body releases a natural anaesthetic agent called endorphins. These are hormones which reduce the pain and make you happy.

'If you keep cutting, you'll get addicted to the whole process,' he warned.

Doctors also warned that if girls are not taught healthier ways to vent their frustrations, they may continue to turn to self-mutilation as a coping mechanism even in adulthood.

'They feel so much pain on the inside that they need to feel it on the outside, so it ends up as physical wounds which they can see, feel and touch,' said Dr Geraldine Tan, a psychologist at Mount Elizabeth Medical Centre.

'It's a reminder that they're okay.'

Dr Tan added that teens who display their wounds are crying for attention and parents must act quickly. She advised parents to look out for tell-tale signs such as the frequent use of plasters and ointment.

Ultimately, the only way to help self-mutilators is to be there for them with a listening ear, she said.

Xiuping, 19, used to cut herself two years ago whenever she quarrelled with her boyfriend.

She stopped after being reassured that others care for her.

'Nowadays, I'd find friends to share my problems with. If they're busy, then I'd find something else to do, like read or do housework,' said the Institute of Technical Education student.

It has been three months since Stephanie last cut herself, but the scars on her forearm are still visible. She now knows that the relief from cutting is only temporary.

'Although I feel a bit better after cutting, I know the scars will remain there forever,' she said.


March 22, 2008
Generation 's': seductive, sensual & savvy

More girls here are becoming sexually active at a younger age - some as young as 10
IT'S not just boys who have sex on their minds all the time. More girls, some as young as primary school pupils, are experimenting with multiple partners and getting addicted to sex, say counsellors and social workers.

At 15, Mindy has slept with more than 50 men. She met most of them at clubs and took them home, while her parents slept in the next room.

After she openly admitted she was having sex, her parents took her to the DSC Clinic run by the Department of STI (Sexually Transmitted Infections) Control in Kelantan Lane. Their intent was not to stop her but to make sure she was protecting herself with contraceptives.

After that, she continued to visit the clinic on her own whenever she contracted new sexually transmitted infections.

According to Dr Tan Hiok Hee, head of the DSC, more than 500 teenage girls - some as young as 10 - were diagnosed with infections in 2006, a three-fold increase from five years ago.

One reason girls have sex at a younger age, he says, is that they generally attain 'sexual maturity' earlier. They also tend to have sex with older men.

Many have unprotected sex on the spur of the moment, in public places such as the beach, parks and toilets, say counsellors.

According to a survey of 3,844 secondary school students conducted by the Health Promotion Board in 2006, the average age a teenager here starts having sex is 15.

Most of the girls interviewed said they did it to get rid of the 'uncool' stigma of remaining a virgin.

Adilah, 17, first had sex with her 16-year-old boyfriend last year at an HDB stairwell in Bukit Batok. 'Some of my friends told me that it was enjoyable and that made me curious. I was the last one to try it,' she says.

Her relationship ended two months later when her parents found love bites on her neck.

Others are like Huifang, who made out with her boyfriend on their first Valentine's night out together. She was 17 and he, 16. They were both insatiably curious.

'It's like seeing a chocolate bar on the top shelf that's hard to reach. So you can't help but want to try it. But after eating it, you realise that it's not as nice as what you thought,' she recalls. They broke up nine months later.

Other girls see sex as a 'postlude' to romance and a testament of love for their boyfriends.

Zayna gave in to her boyfriend, who was eight years older, when she was 13. Less than four months into the relationship, he started asking her for sex every day.

Now 16, she says: 'I did it because I loved him. He also convinced me that he would marry me and not abandon me.' But she eventually left him when he started being abusive.

After a disillusioning first encounter, some begin to see sex as a casual commodity to exchange for money, say counsellors.

There was this case of a teenage girl who made $500 an hour sleeping with her clients. Mr Noel Tan, co-founder of Sanctuary House, which provides support for those with unwanted pregnancies, says: 'Her reasoning was: 'I sleep with my boyfriend for free, why not with other people for money? It's good money'.'

Mr Yusof Ismail, who is chief executive of Ain Society, a voluntary welfare organisation which works with youth at risk, recounts a similar case where a 14-year-old girl had sex with a man she met online in exchange for a new cellphone.

She later became a weekend prostitute. The man became her pimp and paid her a flat rate of $2,000 a week for her services.

'She hated it whenever she had her period because she could not earn money. She would even get a friend from Indonesia to buy her tablets to stop her from menstruating,' he relates.

When she was found out and placed in a girls' home, she was unremorseful. She resolved to return to prostitution once she got out. She also refused to study because she already knew how to earn 'fast money'.

But counsellors warn that sexually active girls have much to lose.

At 15, Norlina was abandoned by her boyfriend after he found out she was pregnant. 'I was very shocked and scared. I was at a loss and didn't dare tell my parents,' she relates.

But her mother found out after overhearing her conversation with a friend and insisted that she abort the baby. By the time Norlina made up her mind to do so, she was already six months pregnant.

Like Norlina, more girls are choosing abortion as a way out of unwanted pregnancies. In 2006, more than 1,300 teenage girls had an abortion, up by over 100 cases from the previous year. Of these, 19 were performed on girls under the age of 15, according to the Health Ministry.

Gynaecologists note that some of these girls often get pregnant again and end up on the operating table again. However, it is difficult to keep track of those who abort repeatedly as they often change doctors or hospitals.

But gynaecologists warn that repeated abortions can cause serious health problems. Dr Kenneth Wong, consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist from the OBGYN Centre, says: 'Repeated abortions can lead to inflammation of the wound cavity, making it harder to conceive in future; or excessive thinning of the womb lining, which may lead to a placenta getting too deeply implanted in a subsequent pregnancy.

'During childbirth, mothers with such abnormal placentas frequently require surgery and have higher risks of complications such as excessive bleeding, which may require a life-saving hysterectomy or end in the mother's death.'

But knowing all that has not stopped Norlina, now 20. After her abortion, she continues to have casual sex. 'But I insist on using protection now as I do not want to get pregnant again,' she says.